Title: The Beautiful Lie 16/?
Fandom: Rizzoli and Isles
Pairing: Jane Rizzoli/Maura Isles
Spoilers: No…not really
Rating: R to NC-17
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. I’m just playing around with them for a while.
Summary: Jane has to deal with changes in Maura’s life and her feelings surrounding them.
A/N:Let’s start with a caveat. I have no idea if I will give Addison her own story. I”m studying Grey’s to see if I think I’m even capable of getting the characterizations down. Now, on with the show! Addison’s goodbye…sigh yes that’s what it is! Our girls are all grown up now. I hope I did it justice. All kind of goodness is abound here I think. Hope you enjoy and as always you know I love to hear from you. Also, I’ve discovered Christina Perri. I suggest ITunes for the song, Distance. It was totally the inspiration. If you like what I have here you can check out my book, Forever Mine at l-book.com who doesn’t love lesbian vampires? Feel free to leave feedback here, on LJ or FFN and do reblog the shit out of it!
Jane buckled her seat belt and sighed. Home alone was definitely not where she wanted to be. What was the difference really? She could pine for Maura from her own couch or she could pine for her right there in her face. It was a simple decision and Jane made it quickly. The easy decisions were… well…easy. It was the more difficult ones that tended to leave Jane contemplating and gathering evidence.
With a flick of her wrist, Jane started the ignition. Turning the music down to a pleasant background hum her thoughts wandered to the evidence at hand. Maura wanted her. She could tell as much in her gaze, her kiss and her touch. Maura cared. There was no other explanation. The sheets, the notes, and a host of other things pointed in that direction. Maura had a singular purpose… to win Jane back.
As Jane pulled out into the street, one question lingered. What would Maura do once she had what she wanted? Jane was no fool or at least she tried not to be so she easily admitted to herself that she was enjoying the hell out of the chase. I’m alive again. Still, she was human and she had been burned, badly, leaving doubt in the ashes to work its way through what remained. With the woman she knew before all this chaos, Jane was sure it wouldn’t have even been an issue, but this Maura had done things that Jane never thought she was capable of so doubt festered. As her body rebelled and her heart reached out, doubt still lingered.
When Maura smiled at her, Jane’s heart believed. With the touch of Maura’s lips or her gaze, Jane knew where she belonged, but what was left of her was stubborn and a little cynical. Even knowing that Maura was chipping away at it, the resistance that was still present held on for dear life. Jane had no idea what proof was needed or what words had to be said to stop the whispers and the hesitancy that kept her from what she wanted…from what she needed. She gripped the steering wheel tightly and resigned herself to enjoy her heart’s desires and her body’s rebellion until the rest of her decided to come along for the ride. What other choice do I have? I can’t go back to the way things used to be, and this is so much fucking better.
Her phone rang.
Jane groaned recognizing the ring immediately. After reaching down into the right pocket of her jeans, she saw her mother’s face smiling back at her as if she had been watching the whole time. I really need to get another picture. This one is just creepy. “Morning, Ma.”
“Oh finally you answer the phone? I haven’t heard from you in months!”
Jane sighed. “I just talked to you a couple of days ago. Do you have to be so dramatic?”
“I wouldn’t call what we had a conversation.”
“I’m sure you’ll send a spy and get all the information you need.”
Angela Rizzoli sputtered. “I would nev— . Well… Frankie refused.”
Jane smiled. “Knew he was my favorite.”
Her smile grew at the sound of her mother’s exasperated sigh.
“You can’t just come here a total wreck and then disappear on me, Janie.”
Jane’s lips wavered.
“I know something’s changed. I can tell just by the sound of your voice.”
Jane swallowed. “I’m sorry about that.”
“No need for apologies. You were hurting and you came home, but I hope that’s behind you?”
Let the fishing expedition begin. “Ma, can we—“
Angela Rizzoli gasped. “Or did you let that redhead get her claws in you? She’s very pretty Jane but she reminds me of those bugs who mate and bite their partners heads off.”
Jane blinked then laughter exploded. “You mean Addison?”
“Yeah, her. See even her name, Addissssson.”
Nearly howling now, Jane sucked in a few deep breaths to try to sober herself. “Oh God. Ma, you’re so going to hell for that. You don’t even know her!” Addison would so get a kick out of this.
“Well, first impressions and all that. You still didn’t answer my question.”
“No, we’re not together. In fact, she’s going back to L.A. today.”
Silence wrapped around them.
“You’re driving. Going to see her off?” Her mother asked.
“No, I’m going to M—“ Jane answered. Damn! It!
“I knew I was right!”
Jane sighed and added an eye roll. “Yes, I’m going to Maura’s. We’re going to take Addison to the airport in a little while.”
“So you two are talking? That’s good right?”
For some reason, the memories of Maura’s whimper reverberated. Jane smirked. We’re doing a hell of a lot more than that. “Yeah, we’re talking.”
“I told her not to give up on you.”
“Well, she most certainly listened, Ma.”
“I remember telling you the same thing. Seems like she was the first to listen.” Her mother added smugly.
“I didn’t know it was a contest.”
“Its not. I was just making a point. Obviously, I should just start calling her.”
“You wouldn’t?!” Jane exclaimed.
“Really? You don’t think so?”
“Fine! We’re talking and trying to see where this goes.”
“I’m going to need more than that.”
Jane sighed. “I want to believe her, but I’m not sure I can completely. Not yet,” she whispered.
“Well, honey that’s going to take time.”
“I know that, Ma.”
“Then what’s the big deal?”
“I guess…I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop.” Jane answered softly.
“Well that’s a way to live isn’t it?”
“It doesn’t always happen you know? The shoe dropping I mean.”
Snorting, Jane answered, “It does to me.”
“Have you told her that?”
“She knows that I’m not completely sure about things.”
“So you’re okay being a little happy?”
“Uh huh.” Angela Rizzoli had a way of putting a ton of questions in the smallest of sounds.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“It means that you’re as stubborn as an old mule, but I guess it’s the Rizzoli way.”
“Uh huh,” Jane added.
“If you’re the woman I think you are, something will get through to you.”
“Well, I guess we’ll see.”
“We will, and I’m glad your Addissssssson is leaving.”
Jane chuckled. “Ma, you’d like her if you had a chance to get to know her, and you’d be thanking her.”
“She’s a big reason why Maura and I are…talking.”
“Huh, well even I can be wrong sometimes.”
Angela Rizzoli chuckled then added, “If you two are talking, there’s nothing to keep you from coming to dinner Monday night.”
“See you at seven! Love you, bye!”
Jane peered at her cell phone. The picture of her mother smiled back at her. “Yeah, definitely need to change that.” Despite her irritation, Jane found that she felt a little lighter. Sometimes a mother does wonders, but there was no way she was going to tell her that.
Maura sipped from her cup of coffee as she walked from the kitchen to the living area. The sound of her cell phone ringing created a habitual flutter in her chest. It was a reaction she hoped that would never become common place and knew she would never take it for granted. Going from famine to a virtual feast concerning Jane had been a hard earned gift that Maura had no intentions of squandering.
“Mm, what are you doing?” Jane asked.
“Playing tag with Bass.”
“Funny. I know I’m early.”
“Should that make a difference to me? You’re always welcome.” Maura added.
“Well its only 10 a.m. and I’m right outside your door.”
A heady warmth seeped into Maura’s pores. “I’m beginning to think that you can’t stay away.” She moved briskly toward the door.
“Well, self-control has never been my thing and I sure as hell don’t have much where you’re concerned.”
A tingle started at the base of Maura’s spine and shot outward. “I’d give lessons but I don’t think it’s part of my repertoire anymore.” She opened the door.
Jane had a smirk waiting for her. “Are you trying to say that I’ve ruined you?” Jane asked as she shoved her phone in her pocket and stepped over the threshold.
Maura should have been prepared by now for her reaction to Jane, but she had learned that each meeting was unique in that it sent her to a new level of overdrive. She stepped back, allowing entry. “Quite possibly.”
“Good to know.”
They stood inches from each other.
Maura’s fingers twitched with the need to reach out and touch. “There was no reason to call first. You have a key.”
Jane took a step forward, closing the minute distance between them. “I didn’t want to be presumptuous.”
“Please…be presumptuous.” Maura whispered.
Jane’s smirk became a full-fledged smile, dimples and all. She plucked the coffee cup from Maura’s grasp and sat it on the table by the door. “Okay.”
As if it were a natural course of action, Maura reached for the lapels on Jane’s shirt, pulling her forward even more. Her body craved the contact. I think I’m becoming an addict. “Okay?”
Maura’s eyes closed as hands tangled in the hair at her nape, causing a shiver. “Okay,” she muttered.
The first brush of lips was soft almost reverent. Still, it started a fire deep in Maura’s belly. She whimpered, changing things completely. Jane’s tongue flicked over her lips and without thought permission was granted. Maura’s whimper turned into twin moans. Tongues battled moistly.
The fire spread quickly, leaving Maura breathless. It has to be illegal…indecent in some part of the world to feel this way. Needing air, she broke the embrace and sucked in a ragged breath. Jane’s lips touched her forehead. Maura hummed in pleasure.
“I could really learn to love that soy shit you put in your coffee if I could taste it like this.” Jane husked.
Maura laughed and met brown eyes, seeing the humor and heat reflected there. “Is that your way of saying you want a cup?”
Jane shrugged. “Possibly.”
“I thought I just did.” Jane’s smirk was back.
Maura’s stomach clenched hard enough to make her gasp. “You’re in a mood this morning.” The look in Jane’s eye couldn’t be mistaken. There was an openness that hadn’t been there before. There were broken pieces still between them, but there were other ones now in place and repaired. I have no idea what I did, but I hope to keep doing it.
“I know.” Jane shrugged again. “Don’t know where it’s coming from really. Must be something in the water.”
“I say we just go with it.” Maura grinned and headed toward the kitchen. Figuratively, Maura held her breath hoping that this easiness between them remained. “Addison would be proud.”
Jane sighed and followed. “Yeah, I still can’t believe she’s leaving.”
“Neither can I.” Maura poured Jane her own cup of coffee and added an obscene amount of sugar.
Jane leaned against the counter and reached for the drink. A sudden charged silence fell around them. Tension radiated off Jane in waves.
Immediately wanting to get to the bottom of it, Maura whispered, “Jane?”
“What if we—“
“We won’t.” Maura interrupted, knowing Jane well enough to know where her thoughts were headed. “We’re adults. We handle difficult things every day. Surely we can handle each other without a mediator. She got us where we needed to be. It’s up to us now.” Maura paused. “I’m not going anywhere, Jane. Are you?” She asked softly.
Jane shook her head. “No, wasn’t planning on it, but she’s been giving us the kick in the ass we needed so far.” She took a long sip from her cup.
“So you’re worried about complacency? I meant what I said about not giving up. I think I’m more invested than ever.”
“That’s good to know too, but I’m still going to miss her.” Jane visibly relaxed.
An uncomfortable pang surged in Maura’s chest. I have no reason to be jealous. The emotion reared its head anyway. She turned away. That was quick. I guess it’s my turn for insecurities.
By the sound of Jane’s voice, Maura knew she had given too much away. “Yes?” She answered over her shoulder.
“Look at me.”
Maura spun around, meeting Jane’s eyes only momentarily.
“I fucked her.”
Maura cringed at Jane’s use of language. It wasn’t a word she wanted associated with any other woman. “I’m aware of that. Can we please not talk about this? I know it’s not rational for me to feel—”
“Look. At. Me.”
Reluctantly, Maura did as she was told.
“I fucked her. She was stress relief. She knows it and so do I. They all were.”
Embarrassment suffused her. “I know. I’m sorry. I have no right—“
“You’re human, and I’ve got to say. I wanted to tear Peter’s head off more than a few times knowing that he was kissing you, touching you…inside you.” Jane paused, holding Maura’s gaze. “When the whole time it should have been me.”
Maura expected the words to be bitter but when they slipped from Jane’s lips, the same possessive heat that could be seen in Jane’s gaze dripped from her words. Jane’s eyes were intense as they studied her. It was tantamount to a physical touch, leaving Maura shaken to the core.
Jane took another sip from her coffee and continued to stare as if she knew every secret and every delicious feeling teeming its way through Maura. “You don’t have a fucking thing to worry about.”
Maura bit her lip and willed her heartbeat to normalcy. It refused and was joined by pulsing pleasure knotting her stomach and seeping between her legs. “No?” Maura asked in a hushed whisper.
“Look at me. What do you think?”
Maura swallowed. The air between them was the consistency of an inferno. “I think that I should finish getting ready.” She pushed away from the counter aware of dark eyes tracking her every movement.
“You do that.” Jane husked.
On decidedly wobbly legs, Maura left the kitchen. For the life of her she couldn’t remember which morning ablutions she hadn’t completed or even if there were any. But in the interest of going slow and to keep from throwing herself at Jane’s feet, Maura decided to just pick one.
Addison peered at the bevy of luggage and smirked. “I guess everything I do is a little over the top.” She pursed her lips, thinking of Jane and Maura, and the smirk became a full-fledged smile. That’s okay because I sure as hell get results.
Glancing around the room, Addison acknowledged that this place was starting to feel like more of a home than she had in a long while. It wasn’t the building and it wasn’t the room. It had been the people she surrounded herself with and that shouldn’t have been the case at all. She had friends in L.A. …family really, and the thought of leaving here shouldn’t cause a pang deep in her chest.
Still, it did.
Yes, she had friends in California, but she had to admit there had been times that they did not see her for who she was as if the brightness she offered had to be subdued to preserve feelings and egos. Jane had never treated her as such and neither had Maura… not now anyway.
It was refreshing.
Maybe it was time to be who she really was bitch and all. Jane and Maura loved her for it. Why the hell shouldn’t everyone else? Maybe Maura isn’t the only one who needs to come in her own.
Addison’s cell phone chirped. Without thought, she answered it. “This is Addison.”
“I’m aware of that, but I suppose to keep things even I should say this is Meredith.”
Irritation raced over her skin, and Addison made sure it was dripping from her words. “So would you like to tell me how you made the transition from texts to a phone call without an ounce of permission?”
Meredith chuckled. “Permission is such a dirty word. I prefer to say I took liberties.”
“Uh huh, goodbye Meredith and if it helps to hear it along with my last text, lose my number.”
“We need you in Seattle for a consult.”
“No, and did I miss the announcement where they made you Chief?”
“No,” Meredith sounded nonplussed. “He was going to call you anyway. I thought since we had established a connection—“
“You might want to use that term loosely or not at all.”
“Look, I know we’re not friends—“
“Really? I was hoping you came out of that delusion.” Addison interrupted.
“You answered me back.”
“So you could have ignored me.” Meredith added.
“Yes, I—“ Why didn’t I? Maura asked that same question.
“Come to Seattle. You won’t even have to speak to me. I swear. We can be ships…ships passing in the hallway who don’t really like each other.”
Addison snorted. “No, and please don’t call me again.”
“That didn’t sound like conviction to me. I’ll tell Owen that you’ll think about it. ‘Kay? Bye.”
Addison blinked and peered at her cell phone. “What the fuck was that?” This is entirely too strange.
The knock at her door startled her. She stared at it for a moment in apprehension expecting Rod Serling. There were only so many surprises she was prepared for in one day.
“I know I’m skinny, but I’ll be damned if I could fit my ass underneath the door.” Jane stated rather loudly. It was followed by mumbling. “Maura said it was rude to keep us waiting.”
Addison grinned. Moving toward the sound, she pulled the door open with flourish. “Well if Maura said it, it must be true. She’s almost British and they are so much better than us mere mortals.”
Jane rolled her eyes as she entered. “No, then she’d have that accent, and I’d have to keep fruit and Gatorade by the bed…”
“Jane!” Maura admonished.
Brown eyes widened. “What? I’m just saying!”
Addison laughed. “It’s good to see you two like this.” She paused. “Now, I’ve had a disturbing few minutes. How about that threesome? I need to cleanse my palette.” Humor I can do. Goodbyes…not so much.
“Addison!” Maura stated in the same tone as before.
“What? Jane promised and we have a good thirty minutes. A lot of damage could be done.”
Maura cracked a smile. “I don’t know if I’d survive if the both of you lived in the same city.”
Addison turned to Jane. “She doesn’t get that I’m being serious does she?”
Jane shrugged and pointed at Addison’s luggage. “They have people, right? Because, no…”
“Of course they do…” Addison and Maura answered simultaneously.
“Ah, the arrogance of the rich.” Jane added.
Addison and Maura shared a grin.
Addison took a second to give them both the once over. “Don’t you two look all glowy.”
“I don’t glow. I keep telling people that.” Jane deadpanned.
“Don’t worry you won’t lose any butch points.” Addison said.
“Jane, this is a losing battle.” Maura interrupted.
“I agree.” Addison added.
“Well, I guess when two doctors agree…”
“Uh huh, so are you going to explain the glowing, because if there was sex involved…”
“No,” Maura moved to Jane’s side, hooking her arm through the crook in Jane’s elbow. “We’re taking things slowly.”
Jane looked down at Maura, and Addison waited for their gazes to meet her own. When a minute passed and nothing happened, warmth suffused her and the huge smile she could feel forming was unstoppable. “Wow,” she whispered. “I’m almost speechless.”
Apparently, Addison’s words were enough to disturb the moment between them. Jane cleared her throat and looked slightly embarrassed while Maura’s eyes twinkled as she leaned her head against Jane’s shoulder. “God, that’s just entirely too sweet. I’d rather the threesome.”
“I guess that’s your definition of almost?” Jane asked with a smirk.
“As close as you guys are probably going to get, but seriously, I fucking rock. Maybe I should get my own reality show. Match making and medicine could go together.”
Maura smiled and shook her head. “Make as many jokes as you like, but we know who you are underneath it all Addison.”
Addison nodded in acknowledgment. “I know you do, and this is why this is so…hard.” Tears stung her eyes and filled the back of her throat. I’m not going to do this. I’m not. Addison looked up at the ceiling.
Silence surrounded them, and when she looked down, she was alone in the room with Maura. There had been no hugs and no girliness and for that she was even more grateful. She peered around at the tap against her arm to see Jane holding a box of tissues. “I don’t need that. This room is so dusty.”
Jane snorted and Addison rewarded her with a smirk.
There was another knock at the door.
“That would be the nice man with the luggage rack. Time to go ladies.”
Minutes later, Addison glanced over her shoulder as she pulled the door closed. I think I’m going to have to visit.
The drive to the airport was short but filled with laughter. When they entered, Addison headed for the sign marked Delta, knowing her friends would follow. She rolled her eyes at the line for security. Turning, she opened her mouth, but Jane beat her to the punch.
“You want us to stay?”
“No, it’s fine. I’ll call when we touchdown?”
Jane nodded. “You’d better.” They had already said their goodbyes the day prior, but Addison could still see the grateful glimmer in Jane’s eyes.
Addison nodded in return and shot them both a gigawatt smile. In her eyes, she hoped they could see all the things she couldn’t say. A few seconds later, Addison turned away and got in line. A tap on her shoulder made her spin around in confusion.
Maura peered back at her with shining eyes. Before she could speak, she was wrapped in a hug. Caught by surprise, Addison stood completely still.
“Thank you,” Maura whispered.
It was those words that made Addison return the embrace in kind. “You’re more than welcome.” Addison watched her walk away and gave a final wave to Jane. Yes, I definitely have to visit.
Stopping at a red light, Jane took the time to glance at Maura. Her insides churned, and somehow she found that to be both a positive and a negative simultaneously. Part of it was nerves…Maura and her were officially on their own now. The other half was pure emotion. She’d said goodbye to a woman who helped to literally change her life. This is going to be a wild ass ride. I just know it.
There was a sniffle.
“It’s appropriate to cry, correct?” Maura asked.
“It is, but she’d kick your ass if she knew you were.”
Maura laughed through the tears. “I know. I’m going to stop. Give me a second. I don’t know why I’m so…so —”
“Normal?” Jane asked.
Maura laughed even more. “Yes, that. I have you to thank for that I suppose.”
“Do I get a plaque or something? Maybe a nice trophy with a nice bust similar to yours?”
Maura gasped unable to contain her mirth. “Stop it! I know… what you’re doing!”
Jane grinned. “Oh yeah? What am I doing?”
“Being you and I can’t thank you enough for giving me a chance to see it.” Maura finished softly.
A horn blew behind them, but Jane couldn’t tear her gaze away as another piece of them that had been so dangerously out of place… slid home.